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Some seminal data suggests that honesty is the best policy. After all, it feels good to be liked by others, so to win his heart you should aim to be the source of such feelings. In the words of Vince Vaughn, “If you call too soon you might scare off a beautiful baby who’s ready to party”.

Shower the object of your desire with attention and gifts. Indeed, one of the principle tenets of the burgeoning pick-up artist business is to mildly insult your prospective partner – “neg” her. Of course, Hollywood scripts and the subjective musings of sex-crazed twenty somethings do not a theory make.

But exactly HOW do you remain the prize when the fear takes hold?

Being the prize isn’t something you’re “doing” like walking a tightrope in a trapeze act.

It isn’t about stringing along a guy and making him feel like he doesn’t quite have you or that you need to constantly dangle a carrot.

It is him knowing that you have options and if he stopped showing up in the relationship, you wouldn’t whine and beg…

Five years ago I had the misfortune of beginning a relationship one week before Valentine’s day.

The thing about dating is we never really learn our lesson.You guys talk a lot about being the prize and while I agree with the idea, I find it really difficult when it comes to guys I really like.I’m not much into rules and seriously hate any type of action that is not authentically me.you’d find another option (which would be readily available) and move on to greener pastures.You have value, he sees that and he knows that if he wants to keep you around, he needs to show up in the relationship and keep you happy.No more dangling dancing string, no more incipient romance. I certainly don’t, but it sure beats waiting by the phone or, since I never did do that for long, sending out a cute and provocative e-mail...having it go unanswered.

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